2019 is already a bust maybe

So, my sister started a blog and it’s really, really good.  Seriously, click the link and read This Coffee Life.  She did all the leg work and research on how to make a blog successful, made a fb page for it, the whole nine.  Meanwhile, I’m sitting over here thinking about how much effort that must take and shaking my head ‘no’ as I drink my second cup of coffee.

She’s really good at fleshing things out, it must be the Language Arts teacher in her, and I’m just not good at trying… well, anything.  I know to have a successful blog that I’m supposed to blog more than once every 4 months and I need to really try to develop content, but we all know that effort has never been my strong suit.  Honestly?  Nothing is my strong suit.  Laziness, maybe.  Laziness is probably what I’m best at in this life.

I thought 2019 was going to be a year where I really thrived at working on myself, on reading more, on my blog, on working hard in general, but none of that has happened.  The first 13 days have been a total bust.  I had these promises of eating healthy for 30 days, tracking my macros every day, no alcohol until February, and I already frigged it all up, but hey, that’s me.  I’ll blame circumstances, and some of it really was circumstantial (my excuses have excuses), but honestly, I’m just really bad at staying on course.  Always have been.  Shrug dot emoji.  I’m not a life coach, friends.  I’m just gonna hug you and say, “It’s cool, we’ll try again tomorrow” and offer you something unhealthy to eat and maybe a beer or a glass of wine.

To be TOTALLY FAIR, I started getting sick last weekend and while I didn’t use that as an excuse to eat poorly, I couldn’t work out without hacking up a lung to the point of dry heaves because thank you bronchitis.  I’m starting to feel more normal today, but I can’t hear out of either ear and the thought of going back to work makes me want to sleep until next weekend because I literally just can’t.  GUYS, I CANNOT.  Whatever, 2019, I still have time to slay you, but I wont, so maybe 2020?  Here here, positivity!

Anywho, so Andi legitimately has her life together and has this beautiful blog, and I’m over here sitting in the same clothes from Friday, wondering if I can do some yoga and eat a vegetable today.  The jury is still out on both of those subjects, but we’ll see.

I think I’ll get my 3rd cup of coffee, and yes, I am still on coffee because I didn’t get out of bed until 11:30am, and then decide if I can somehow will myself into being a human being.  Is this the quality content you crave?  Knowing that someone is as bad at life as you are?  Well, look no further fella, you found me.  That’s a Chappelle’s Show quote — all of my material is from 2004.  Love me through it.

Thanks, Sis, for inspiring me to write my first blog since October.

See y’all in April.

Well, it’s September and I don’t have a drastic ‘before & after’ photo regarding my fitness journey.

Typical.

Anyone who has ever met me knows that I have a reaaaaaaaaaally hard time with consistency, unless consistency means being inconsistent then I am INCREDIBLY consistent.  I mean, that counts for something, right?

When Chad and I moved into our house 3 years ago, we got a treadmill set up a home gym.  I hate going to a gym.  I flat out wont do it.  The only gym that I will show my face in is my Aunt’s amazing women’s only facility in Paintsville (Spirit Strong Fitness Studio, look it up) — and it really is amazing.  Anything else?  I’m not doing it, and if you hate something that makes the task miserable, and if you’re miserable you aren’t enjoying taking care of yourself (fitness is good, y’all), and if you aren’t enjoying it you’re eating 24 tacos because a taco 12 pack is only $20.  Don’t ask me how I know.

So, anywho, I started doing workouts at home and membership to streaming fitness service and I love it.  But, more on that at a later time.

Back to not having a super drastic before and after for this year — it’s fine.  I’ve figured out that finding a six pack behind the pizza that I truly enjoy (I loooove pizza, do you love pizza? Are you in a relationship with pizza?) wasn’t what this year was about at all.  See, I am really hard on myself.  I was.  Past tense.  I would stand in the mirror and look at my stomach and repeat how disgusting I was and believe it.  I believed it deeply and sometimes I still do if I let myself go to that ugly place.  Over a freaking stomach, you know?  Who in the world cares?  It’s skin, why would I believe it’s so inherently bad to have looser skin there?  Not just that, but I would beat myself up over ‘bad’ choices and shift between counting every gram of everything that went in my mouth to eating without abandon.  There was rarely a happy medium with me because.. you know… I’m me.

The drastic before and after that FINALLY happened to me can’t really be captured in a photograph.  Although, you can see a huge difference in my legs (hellloooooo quad and calf city!), the before and after that’s so amazing has been internal.  I don’t hate myself when I look in a mirror, I don’t even mind my body — it’s totally fine.  It’s better than fine.  It’s strong and it’s soft, I can run and squat and keep up with anyone, but I also enjoy my friends and family because food is typically the centerpiece of any time you spend quality time with people.

I’m not going to stop enjoying food.  I really, really, really do love salads and veggies, but I don’t want to eat that every single meal. So, dine in restaurants are a special time where I get yummy things that I enjoy without going overboard. It sounds incredibly simple, but what if you have 3 dinner engagements in one week?  Well, obviously, don’t get loaded fries and hot wings at all 3 (or do, honey, I am not your boss).  Instead, splurge 1 meal, and then the other 2 can still be incredibly yummy if you play your cards right.

I am all about playing my cards right with food, let me tell ya.

I’ve been wondering how many of y’all reading might be interested in a little group, no strings, no dues, nothing but me just putting some info out and answering questions.  I’m not a registered anything, but I am a registered foodie, work out enthusiast, and pizza topping aficionado and I reckon some of y’all can relate to that, and thus, relate to me. We might even have some fun! I think we will totally have fun.

If you’re interested and scared and worried and apprehensive that someone might judge you, lets sit down and talk, or chat, or text.  The mindset shift has been real this year and also I have a butt so don’t you tell me that dreams don’t come true!